best friends

They were best friends…When Xander was born and all thick hair and cute and then as a toddler when Oliver played with him like some sort of enraptured doll who would laugh and clap at his every word and silly face. Then as Alexander grew older and Oliver matured at great speed, the gap between them ( 2 years and 7 months) grew. Emotionally. Xander wanted Oliver toys and time, and frankly Oliver wanted to be an only child again, so much so he’d ask me why I had another baby, why he wasn’t enough for Peter and I. Really.

Recently though, aged 8 and 5 respectively, we’ve reached a turning point in their relationship. Alexander is a bright little 5 year old and has become quite the match for his older, ‘born older than his years brother’. They can now play together in a meaningful way and have more in depth conversations on all the important things in life such as whether fish fingers or beef burgers are tastier…They can now play basketball and football together and love to compete over who swings highest in the playground. They love to bake and take it in turns to wash my hair,  and somehow, eventually they’ve learnt to share me, their mama: my love and my limbs after fighting over me for so long.

I now catch them laughing at jokes they tell one another and marvel at the fact they’ve just played uninterrupted for a few hours, just playing without squabbling, something so simple which was previously unheard of. We actually had a relaxing holiday last week as the kids played mostly peacefully with one another and attended the Kids’ Club hand-in-hand most days.

Yes they still argue, yes they still fight over who I cuddle first but 90% of the time, they’re the best friends and that’s good enough for me.

If you’re struggling right now with kids and wonder if sibling rivalry will ever turn to love, it will, eventually so fear not.

best friends

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4 Responses

  1. Leila Walker

    Beautiful. Every parent should read this blog. Jesus said only those that are like children could know the kingdom of God. Thanks, for reminding us of the beauty, awe, and wonder of childhood. I can’t be thankful enough I found a guiding light like you.

  2. Julia

    All the children want to be friend with their parents, but I guess the parents don’t have time for that, they have appointments, meetings, important phone calls… until it’s too late. This speech open my eyes, and I hope I can implement this word.

  3. Rachel

    Loved reading this! It’s so nice when siblings are friends. Definitely a reason to have another one! x

  4. Morgan Prince

    Aw this is lovely. With more than 4 years between my boys it has been a learning experience to say the least. When BP was 8 and LP was 4 they could play together – sometimes – and it was nice. Now BP is 13 (going on 17) and likes his alone time, much to the disappointment of LP who wants him to play football (which BP hates!). They do play together sometimes, but only when BP is feeling playful and that doesn’t happen often. I think the point is to enjoy those times when they *do* play together, because it won’t be long before everything changes again. Glad you got to have a lovely holiday. xxx


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