Urgh, right now it feels like greater pressure- on top of weight pressures- to not be able to actually admit I'm feeling down about my weight going up!
Pregnancy - and especially your first pregnancy - can be a daunting experience. As a self-certified hypochondriac, even the smallest ailment is enough to to send my worry-levels into overdrive, so as you can imagine, when 'with bump' this was a million times worse.
It's so easy in life to be constantly chasing dreams, and believe me, I'm a big believer in dreaming big, working hard, and simply going for 'it' whatever 'it' might be, but recently I've had a little shift in thinking...
If there wasn't enough anxiety-filled pressure when you're pregnant (big bump, little bump, too much weight, not enough) once you pop that baby out or have him airlifted as I did twice, first an emergency, second an elective (the latter a whole other set of pressures, of which I ignored wholeheartedly) you are quickly, at least with first baby anointed with parenting pressures.
Now that Alexander has turned 6 months old, I've started reflecting on my pregnancy with him..it seems so far away now and aside from missing my bump some days, what I really miss is my purpose of 'Head Foetus Grower and Protector'.
Baby Alexander was born on the 20th of September at 10.52am, weighing 8lbs 2. We are all truly besotted with our little man, especially big brother Oliver who utterly adores him. There are some very sweet pictures of the boys together on my FB Honest Mum page.
I appear to be in full on crazy lady nesting mode right now and find myself obsessively organising like crazy. Even my Tivo box favourite shows are in order of preference (Kardashians and back issues of TOWIE first)-what I'm pregnant... and yesterday saw me sorting out my husband's sock drawer. In my defence I was high on Celebrations chocolates and the latest episode of Corrie.
My first pregnancy was pretty tough with daily vomiting continuing until I was 28 weeks. Not fun. At. All. It also meant living on walkers, dry biscuits and dairylea (whatever I could stomach) daily and sadly no exercise (even a ride in the car induced puking).
No don't get too excited-I won't be attending this year *weeps. You see being up the duff is not ideal for party going Cannes plus I have writing commitments to get on with (must stop procrastinating and writing this blog, instead) but Cannes is AMAZING.
So today was my 20 week scan and if you haven't guessed already...it's a boy! Am totally thrilled as I always imagined myself with two boys (although I appreciate I will be utterly outnumbered in the house and Arsenal might never get turned off the box)!
