Can we take a minute to talk money?

We all need it, and I know it’s a seemingly British thing not to discuss it, acknowledge its existence or seemingly even write about it, but as far as I’m concerned it’s integral we do. As women we need to discuss the dollar (or you know,  the pound).

But I would say that because I believe in self-worth and not being scared to talk money.

Culture and money have always been inextricably linked, the sooner we all accept this and story fearing ‘money conversations’, the better.

My intention here is that this post should empower and reinforce by naturalizing the discussion of money, for all of us, so we can earn what we deserve.

We need to deconstruct for a moment why I even feel the need to include that disclaimer.

I’m sure a man writing this wouldn’t do the same but it’s sadly, somehow indoctrinated in we women that talking money is not a ‘female’ thing to do. It’s crude. Impolite. Unnecessary.

Well, a BIG ‘no’ to that.

As a director/producer I was in charge not just of the creative side of productions in TV and film but in many cases, the budgets too and they were often pretty big budgets at that.

Female directors are still regarded a risk by the film industry when it comes to pulling and making big budget movies and TV series. It’s changing slowly, as women like Sofia Coppola and Sam Taylor-Wood (who also studied at Goldsmiths’ University of London  as I did, and I admire hugely), are proving.

Yes it’s sexism at play and inequality-female actors are not paid the same as their male counterparts as has been widely covered in the press, but there are also too few female execs making the decisions at the top, with the power to commission women and stories that feature women as leads-stories about women for women.

The same is true of ethnic minorities

And this isn’t just playing out in Hollywood either-

Women like you and I, every day often pause before asking about budgets, what fees are on offer for freelance work, whether there’s more in the pot, we worry we’ll be regarded too forward, too presumptuous, to ask for what we feel we are worth.

Not all of course, but some, might struggle-

To negotiate.

To hustle.

To seal the deal.

Over the years, I have stopped pausing.

I have asked the question, negotiated, asked for what I feel is fair.

It’s second nature now.

As a blogger I put the hours in, I manage a small team, I constantly hone my voice, do my research, never cease to keep improving or trying to improve at the very least, and when it comes to commissions, the big or the small, I deliver to the best of my ability.

Of course art nor business is ever smooth running.

I pick myself up when things don’t go to plan or I’m rejected from jobs I crossed my fingers and toes for, but most of all I CRACK ON.

Those three words became the mission statement on a panel I was privileged to speak on at the British Library recently when notable women kept returning to it.

Panel speakers included one of my business partners, Jessica Huie (Colourblind Cards and Jessica Huie PR), and Kerrie Dorman (The Restaurant Mentors) who made that statement originally.

It was something covered again in mine and Jessica’s workshop ‘Turning Passion Into Pounds‘ for Stylist Magazine.

Bucking down and cracking on.

Yes to that.

Whatever happens, whatever knocks, turning points (good or bad), simply crack on, sisters.

I almost forgot something else hugely important to me.

Helping others.

Sharing experiences in life, and in business.

Building a community, a future, a flexible way of working where before there wasn’t one that worked before.


Making one plus one equal success.

I’m a blogger but also a consultant too, whereby I often recommend others for work, which means dynamic, exciting and sometimes huge contracts-and nothing feels more exciting or rewarding than getting others gigs.


It’s a buzz.

It’s simultaneously altruist yet self-serving, so oxymoronic then, and why’s that a bad thing anyway?!

That’s what giving is right? Sharing, learning, reminding yourself of what you know and garnering insight and fresh perspective from others. Marrying skills and experience and thriving.

Doing good is satisfying for the receiver  and the giver.

But back to money, creative pursuits need not be rewarded financially.

Why does doing something you love have to be, literally at the expense of earning power.

You don’t have to suffer for your art. The democracy of online and its lucrative nature has turned that on its head.

Yet still, why is ambition and financial potential diminished or devalued still, today, for women in nearly 2016?

Why are we scared to stand up and say we want more. More jobs, more opportunities, more money.

Can more women please talk money, stop fearing discussing it, so they negotiate freely, with greater confidence, go get the bank loans to launch their new businesses or garner investment, and seal the deals because until that side of business becomes the norm for women as it is men, we freelance self-employed ladies will keep on struggling.

Start now.

Know your worth and put it out there. Stop being scared to discuss money.

Make that a new year’s resolution worth sticking to.

Photo by NeONBRAND on Unsplash

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Let's Talk Money - Honest Mum

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22 Responses

  1. Jane Allen

    I nodded throughout this post. You’re so spot-on. Women should know their value and ask for it. Rejections may come but it’s all part of the process of building our confidence. I so much appreciate this post!
    Jane Allen recently posted…What is the Best Recliner for Newborn?My Profile

  2. karen jones

    I’m so with you on this one. There was a time I was insanly pleased just to receive an email from some random PR offering me a packet of soup to review. These days I am far less obsessed with my blog, I write what and when I like, don’t take myself too seriously and oddly have more approaches than ever before. I reply to PR’s with my rates which reflect the work involved in the post and this also includes when i am sent items to review. I don’t mind if i don’t get the gig, I am always polite but firm but I know my worth . xxx Go you lovely lady xx
    karen jones recently posted…The Elephant in the roomMy Profile

    • Honest Mum

      Absolutely, so important to value yourself and particularly in such a rapidly growing, thriving and exciting digital space. Thanks for this awesome comment x

  3. Claire

    Yeah Vicki, just seen this post on Facebook and had to stop by. Love this post. I never get offered money, only on the odd doggie looking email…but I never ask either. I have a great feeling about 2016 I just need to build up the confidence to ask and if I get rejected to move on quickly 🙂
    Claire recently posted…Rockin Around The Christmas Tree In A Polka Dot Dress…My Profile

  4. Alex Gladwin

    YES to this. I’ve learned this over my years of blogging, but I hear of others struggling to ask. Why should we be afraid to talk money? We all need it! xx

  5. susankmann

    Excellent post, it is very true. Sometimes we aren’t quite good at selling ourselves, especially for what we are worth. Great post hon and lovely to see you ooze with confidence that I know doesn’t always come easy xx
    susankmann recently posted…NSPCC Letters From SantaMy Profile

    • Honest Mum

      Thanks Susan, really appreciate your kind words, confidence, gaining and retaining is a journey for us all, amazing to see the supportive network we have here. Well done on all your success and I hope we get to meet up next year x

  6. Leigh - Headspace Perspective

    Kick-ass once again Vicki! Our aversion to talking about money seems daft doesn’t it – it’s not like fairies pay the bills and in this day and age there are so many ways to bring in the cash as you prove so very well.

    And the discrimination against women, as though we’re less able to handle a budget (they seem to forget many of us balance the household accounts).

    And yes – altruism is wonderful too. Nothing wrong with that buzz and it’s not an oxymoron really – there’s a quote somewhere about kindness being a great gift for you and the recipient too. Much love xxx
    Leigh – Headspace Perspective recently posted…The Second Christmas After HugoMy Profile

    • Honest Mum

      Thank you so much Leigh and for affirming that the buzz of giving isn’t a contradiction. Love your true words, I feel times are changing and we women are leading the way xx

  7. Morgan Prince

    Absolutely brilliant! Yes, you are so right honey! I always hesitate before trying to negotiate fees and always wonder if I’m asking for too much. I *so* need to have more confidence. Thanks for sharing this empowering post. 🙂
    Morgan Prince recently posted…‘Tis the Season for Pantos!My Profile

  8. Amanda

    Love this latest kick-ass post and you know it’s become my mantra since I met you, that’s why you inspired my most recent post! There’s nothing wrong with a sassy woman. #crackon
    Amanda recently posted…Girl Power & New Year New You!My Profile

  9. Angela at Daysinbed

    Yes, i agree totally. I know my worth finally! It’s taken time but I work my butt off each and every day and yes my time is precious so I will ask for what is fair! I love this post. It is how i feel. I negotiate and hustle and like you, every time i get knocked back I keep going and crack on… love that phrase!

    Angela at Daysinbed recently posted…To The Parent whose Child is in Care at ChristmasMy Profile

  10. Kate Trout

    Love this! Very important post! Women should be empowered to not only talk about money, but to be encouraged to go out there aggressively and actually earn it! There is absolutely nothing wrong with a strong-willed woman who knows what she wants in the form of financial security, and goes out there and gets it done!
    Kate Trout recently posted…5 Ways to Make Flying with Your Baby EasierMy Profile

  11. Wave to Mummy

    YES! Exactly right.

    We talked a bit about this a while back, and it really is true, women just have to lean in a bit more and recognise their self worth. One of the reasons why women still get paid less than men is partly because money isn’t talked about and women don’t know what they could get. It doesn’t help that for women you are often raised to be grateful and modest, so you feel anxious to ask for more.

    Great post. Hopefully it will make women think and ask for what they deserve (which almost always is more than what you are currently getting!).
    Wave to Mummy recently posted…Welcome to my Scandinavian Christmas homeMy Profile

    • Honest Mum

      YES to that, you are right, the more we talk, blog and share the importance of valuing yourself and putting a price on your worth and time, the easier and quicker it will be to garner and spread success like wild fire. Thanks for your amazing comment.

  12. Clare

    I so enjoyed reading that post – hell yeah we are so worth the big bucks / we work just as hard / I say CRACK ON
    cheers Clare X


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