It’s the first day back to school for my sons who are 6 and 8, and my first proper day working again (I did a bit of social media work and telly over the holidays but not much), and I’m feeling all of the feels: sad, happy, anxious, excited, tearful-what a roller-coaster, and it’s only 11 am.
I’ve spent every single day with the kids for the last 2 1/2 weeks, enjoying holidays in Prague and the Cotswolds where I fully switched off as well as meet-ups with family and friends, movie marathons, bake offs (yes we’re competitive when it comes to cakes, here), long lie-ins, brisk walks and more, and now normality has well and truly hit, and it feels a little bitter sweet. Bitter because I miss my boys already and it’s only 2 hours since drop-off and sweet because I love my job and know in my heart of hearts, we all require routine, again.
Routine to work and play in a more structured way. To write more. Yes, I’m prolific and quick so you might be wondering how ‘more’ is possible but I want to write daily again as my hero Seth Godin does. I also want to wake up before 10 am and to eat oats over dark chocolate rice cakes for breakfast please.
Admittedly, I didn’t blog as much over the holidays, I simply wrote when the mood struck me because I can’t NOT write and setting myself a daily task to blog excites me.
Writing is as vital to me as avocado Subways (which are LIFE by the way) and blogging is my favourite form of therapy: it’s cathartic, nourishing and of course, fun. It’s my favourite act of self-care.
I’m committing to writing everyday here as I used to, even if it’s just one short post, it’s happening. I wrote endlessly when writing my book of course, and prior to that several times a day here, and now MUMBOSS has been out since May, the time has come to dedicate myself and my creative muscles to blogging once again. To give my first baby a little more attention.
Being informed I was a finalist in the UK Blog Awards 2019, today, has also given me an extra boost (thank you so much to all who voted for me).
So, yes to routine. For my kids and my work-day.
With packed lunches at the ready for the new term, uniform ironed and laid out from the night before, desks cleared for homework time, more hot dinners and fewer carpet picnics, posts written, deadlines met, cuddles and books before bedtime over Nailed It on Netflix and late nights, and the usual race towards the weekend for quality time together (and carpet picnics and Nailed it).
We’re all so busy but these holidays taught me the importance of doing very little and also saying ‘no’ more, being protective of my time and energy. Of getting off the hamster wheel of school and work commitments and just chilling out. Of meditating, practising yoga and beating my kids at board games (ha). Of how delightful it feels to remove pressure from my day to day life. Pressure to be anywhere at a certain time or meet/exceed expectations. Of being able to slob in Pjs and simply be myself around those who love me unconditionally.
I always put my family and husband first but I adore and need my job to be happy too. It’s a juggle. It always will be. But, it’s worth it. So I’m reminding myself of that today as I yearn for kisses with my kids and chocolate rice cakes for breakfast!
I realised today as I straightened Xander’s collar and brushed Oliver’s bed-hair flat that while I’m sad it’s the end of the holidays, the magic doesn’t need to end, in fact it exists and thrives in these small moments, not just the grand gestures and trips abroad. The magic lives in the collar straightening and the hair brushing. In the stories we invent at bedtime (thanks for my next book idea boys), in the bear hugs, and hilarious and silly shorthand we share. In the nicknames we’ve given ourselves and when Xander tries to plait my hair. Life is a collection of these moments. Many of them mundane and ordinary but magical all the same.