Pinterest-obsessed, an image came up last night reminding me of the famous saying that people enter your life for a season, a reason or a lifetime, and it got me pondering about friendship primarily.
Friends are a bit like pebbles in the sea drifting in and out with the pull of the waves: some change with you, morphing into grains of sand, others lie low and return, stronger than ever. YES, sand returns to stone. I Googled it. Google does not lie. Anyway, roll with my analogy, OK!
Seriously, I feel lucky that I’ve known some of my pals for so long, just thinking about the stretch of years, makes me feel old. And I never feel old.
11, 16, 19 and 21 are the ages I met some of my oldest, closest friends: Carlie, Caroline, Rachael, Julie, Will, Sharmin and Amancay. Anchors in the choppy sea of tween, teen and adulthood. There for the rough times and the fun times: skinny dipping (not literally, we wore swimwear and the photo above in Cannes reminds me of running into the water in cocktail dresses after a very fun film festival party)…Mates though, there for me in all the times I cried me a river, or burst into tear of joy. The familiar. Family. Communicating via a shorthand borne from years and years. One look, one word, or none is always enough. Belly laughter and aching jaws. Long chats. Quick texts. Wanting the world for one another. My rocks (literally).
See, that analogy came through *phew.
…Later, through blogging, many more unbreakable bonds have been forged (too many to mention), friends for life: fellow bloggers and even PRs, blooming flowers that grew alongside and sadly despite of the weeds: the backstabbers, naysayers and fair-weather friends. It can be a bad world out there babe, but it sure makes your skin thick.
The school mums and dads too the ones there to share the mental and physical load, to lend a hand, an ear, the ones who know and understand.
…Mates I made in Windsor: neighbours, family of friends and friends of friends. I feel so lucky to have them.
When it comes to relationships: my husband is my number 1 (OK my number 3 after my sons), a man I love more each day despite the fact we bicker and absolutely because of the fact, we’re polar opposites. We’ve been together since our 20s. Two people so in sync, we’d ruin another couple (as the saying goes).
Work relationships are like marriages in many ways. Some are intense for short bursts, others stick around forevs.
…Argh, they’ve been friendships past I miss, of course. Bridges burnt because of pride, misunderstandings or simply too much stress. Moving homes, cities or having kids. They each served a time in our lives, a period of want or need, a collection of many moments, it made sense to be that close.
But I’ve learnt with age that not every bond is built to last. That people let you down. That people can wear you down. That not everyone is good for your soul. That you as much as they make mistakes. And, that some friendships just run out of charge. We all grow and change. Sometimes together, sometimes apart.
People won’t stop entering your life (and thank goodness for that): some for a season, some for a reason and some (the good eggs) with any luck, will hopefully stick around for a lifetime.