I’ve always been a bit of a girl’s girl, I’m still friends with many of my oldest girlfriends from school and sixth form… and university (Emma, Ruth, Amancay, Sharmin), then from working in the film industry for years and blogging; I just love how empowering good female friends are and I’d be lost without them!

I wanted to share some of my closest pals (there are more but no one could agree on the pictures-friends huh!)

Below with one of my besties, Carlie who I’ve known forever too!

friends

Rachael and I met in Sixth Form and got close again when I moved back to Leeds. 

Great friends-yummy mummiesWith Julie below, who I’ve known since I was thirteen!

Vicki and Julie

With the fabulous Nicci whom I met when she cast a drama series I directed and we became great friends! 

Friends-Honest Mum

 Along with Amancay, (a filmmaker friend I met at Uni below), Nicci and I had the time of our lives at the Cannes Film Festival earlier this year!  

Great friends-Honest Mum

With Sharmin (and Amancay) below, who lives in Amsterdam and whom I also count as a sister!

friends-Honest Mum

And talking of distance or time, it simply doesn’t exist when it comes to real friends. I met up with Emma who lives in LA last Christmas after not seeing her since my trip to LA year before and nothing had changed. In fact it might just have been one of the best girly weekends EVER!

best friends-Honest Mum

With my amazing friend Ruth whom I shared first time motherhood with, becoming firm friends.

Ruth and Vicki

Quick disclaimer, I’ve also managed to hold onto a male friend too (go me!)-Will-the only one left (worth ten of course) when all my other men friends fled post marriage and kids…such a dude!

best friends-Honest Mum

In all seriousness, aged 33 I I look around at all the friends in my life (OK I look at their twitter handles and FB profiles-ha) and feel truly content that the pals I’ve got, the ones which have stood the test of time and endured the ups and the downs are real forever friends, the keepers.

My Mum always says regard friends as ‘horses for courses’, not every buddy has to be your bestie or rock your world (great if a handful do of course), some are just (and only) great for a night of partying, a quick cuppa or a baby meet up (and not necessarily ones you’d call at 3am with a problem)! Of course I feel so many are all of the above and more, but I get what she means, simply don’t have huge expectations with every friendship.

You just need to connect in some way and it shouldn’t feel tough going…friendship is down to chemisty, if it works, it works…

…I’m always be open to new friendships too (you can never have too many friends) and let me tell you, there’s nothing quite like blogging when it comes to acquiring more ‘sisters’!

Women can be cruel (as can men), jealous and competitive (healthy competition is great as long as it’s just that) but the ladies in my life, online and off are inspiring, strong, supportive, wise women I couldn’t be without.

Old and new friends who make me feel good, lift my spirits and simply ‘get me and all my imperfections’ and I them. That’s what’s important with people. To be yourself and have fun.

I’ve cut out the fake friends over the years, ‘the dementors’ as I call them, that drained my energy or weren’t sincere, leaving me time to focus on the good eggs-kids really help you hone in on who matters thanks to limited time!

There are of course friends I’m sad I drifted from, the ones I miss but that’s life and old friends can come back into your life at any time and they have with me like with my great friend Jules…

More than anything, I think real friends make you feel untouchable. The ones that tell you when you’re wrong yet simply want the best for you. The ones that know not to arrange to see you (me) when it’s PMT week and will drop everything in your time of need (PMT week) and remeber you’re not a psycho, it’s just that time! It’s not about giving gifts or even time when they don’t have it, it’s just knowing there are there. ..

Those friendships, those enduring, laugh out loud, weep together mates protect and empower me.

Because we all need and want friends (and I say that as someone who counts her husband as her best friend too)!

…Because as my feminist Mum who gave me a badge to wear aged 2 with the words, “women together are strong” always knew, together we can build one another up and back together again like no one else.

And that’s exactly what my blogger friends and I do to one another-

With blogging bestie Mirka below!

Blogger besties-Honest Mum

I once thought you can only count your real your friends on one hand but since becoming a blogger, I know that’s simply just not true,  I’ve run out of fingers… and it feels so good…

 

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29 Responses

  1. MsXpat

    I’ve often blogged about my friends and their importance to me. As an expat friendships are even more vital. Thankfully, I’m blessed to have great friends. And yes, they each have a different ‘role’ in my life so to speak.

    I enjoyed this post :0)
    MsXpat recently posted…50 Shades of RedMy Profile

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  2. Heledd - Running in Lavender

    Oh what a beautiful post! I’m such a girls girl too and I’m very much an all or nothing kind of person. I have good friends, who mean the world to me and like you I’m fortunate to be in contact with school, Uni and work friends. Friends are so important and I’m now enjoying making new friends through the blogging community and the parents at Lili’s new school.

    #AllAboutYou

    Reply
    • honestmum

      Thanks so much lovely, it’s amazing when new worlds open up fab new friendships isn’t it. Lovely to be getting to know you more sweetie through your blog, you rock x

      Reply
  3. Caroline (Becoming a SAHM)

    Aww lovely post! Good friendships really are amazing and can make you feel amazing. After some tough times with less wonderful friends (dementors I think you would call them!) I really appreciate my true friends so much more. Its not always about how long you’ve known someone or proximity, sometimes I is just about chemistry and some friendships just work! Fab post #allaboutyou
    Caroline (Becoming a SAHM) recently posted…Monkey’s Musings at 28 mthsMy Profile

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    • honestmum

      You are so right Caroline and you really do appreciate your friends more once you’ve rid yourselves of the ones not worth having x

      Reply
  4. Sharmin

    Such a fabulous and inspiring post hon and i feel honoured to be included in it too. And honoured to be your friend. Like sista’s innit 😉 Love you babe!! xx

    Reply
  5. Hannah Mums' Days

    The pearls of wisdom from your mama astounds me! What a fabulous woman to have in your life, and probably a great reason as to why you’re a fabulous woman to have in my life. I told you earlier that I didn’t have the best time in the world with girls as i was growing up (school can be a mean place!), and then studying and working in a male dominated industry didn’t help me to ‘get over it’… but it’s now I’m a mum and a blogger that I’m really realising the true strength women really do have. That’s why it’s so important we support rather than turn on each other.

    loved this post and, of course, you! xxx
    Hannah Mums’ Days recently posted…In the Dunes…My Profile

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    • honestmum

      Thanks sweetie for your kind words, I told you when we first met, I’d felt like I’d known you forever, just love how easy it all flows when I meet up with you and the other ladies, you guys rock! So lovely to read being a blogger has introduced you to great female friends, lots of love to you x

      Reply
  6. Kitty - Glamorous Mummy

    Beautiful post! Good friends are the one thing I miss about having moved so far from my old life. I know we can keep in touch on twitter/FB etc but it’s really not the same, for me anyway. I haven’t been great at making friends up here. I thought I had made some good ones but I suppose as time goes on, you discover more about one another & I suppose they found things about me they didn’t like & many have drifted away again. But I’m not going to pretend to be something or someone I’m not, just to make ‘friends’ when clearly if they were real ‘friends’ they would like me as I am!
    Kitty – Glamorous Mummy recently posted…Lunchbox Banana & Apple Loaf CakeMy Profile

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    • honestmum

      So right darling and there is nothing, nothing that compares to meeting up in person regularly with great friends, I agree the real ones, the ones that get you are all that matters. I’ve met so many people that just didn’t make me feel good, it’s all about chemistry. Don’t you change. Where are you based?

      Reply
      • Kitty

        In Lincolnshire now, moved up from Dorset Coast two years ago(exactly!) I’m sure I’ll make more friends, better friends as time goes on x
        Kitty recently posted…Lunchbox Banana & Apple Loaf CakeMy Profile

      • honestmum

        You absolutely will, we moved around a lot-London-Bristol then back to Leeds and it can be hard to find new friends and I think being selective is good, you know what you want from friendship and can tell who are the ones you want to spend time with! Hope we get to meet one day x

  7. Babystuff.tips

    I totally agree. I have 3 besties and I would be lost without them. I also cut out anyone that I recognise as toxic. Life is to short for all that crap.
    Babystuff.tips recently posted…Providing for MyselfMy Profile

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  8. Leigh - Headspace Perspective

    What a gorgeous post, full of gorgeous photos of gorgeous women! You’re so right, friendship is about chemistry, and it is so important to have friends who ‘get’ you…so you’re there for each other through thick and thin. I’ve certainly learnt the value of that this year! I’ve also made so many wonderful new friends online and through blogging – thank you for being a good friend to me through Twitter and my blog.

    I like the use of ‘dementors’ to describe the energy sappers – pretty apt. Sometimes you need to separate yourself from all that for your own sanity and emotional well-being xxx
    Leigh – Headspace Perspective recently posted…An open letter to the neonatal unit staff who cared for HugoMy Profile

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    • honestmum

      You really do darling and I think you realise who you’re real friends are in times of need, thanks for being a lovely friend to me too, twitter and blogging is so great for making new friendships, thanks for your lovely comment x

      Reply
  9. Mama and More aka Zaz

    I really think I could write about friendships every single week! I love this post, and especially love that you have “run out of fingers”. Brilliant! So happy to be one of those you count as friends, and absolutely mutual feeling lovely xxxx
    Mama and More aka Zaz recently posted…Because I’m happy – to be in transition to fall fashion and my fab forties!My Profile

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    • honestmum

      Aw thanks sweetie, I know I write so often about friendship too, fascinates me and makes me realise how important you all are, thanks for being such a great friend darling x

      Reply
  10. Ebabee

    What lovely thoughts and a wonderful post. Your mum is one smart lady and you have got all those fabulous genes from her. You know I feel totally the same about you. As you’ve said in the past – ‘sisters from other misters’ – you are my online sister- Big kiss xx
    Ebabee recently posted…Friday chat: Making your dreams come trueMy Profile

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  11. Amber

    How are you and all of your friends so GORGEOUS? Do you hang out in beautiful-people-only locations? 😉

    Seriously though, this is a great post. I love so much that the blogging community is such an inclusive one, that one CAN make actual, real friends through sharing one’s thoughts on the internet. We’re so lucky to live in this day and age, where friendships aren’t limited by geography.

    Reply
    • honestmum

      Hahah thanks Amber, they are all stunners aren’t they?! Thanks for the compliment too! We really are so lucky, I remember feeling so alone with my first child and those online friendships along with my oldest ones were such a life line, thanks for your fab comment x

      Reply
  12. Mirka Moore @Kahanka

    What a great post to read on a Monday morning. I am so happy to be one of your mates, and you know well how much that means to me. I wish I was able to see you more often, but luckily we are daily in touch. You have always been her for me, and you know when you need anything, I am here too. I think we are very lucky we have you xxx
    Mirka Moore @Kahanka recently posted…The Gallery: FamilyMy Profile

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  13. Babes about Town

    The dementors? Lol! Cut ’em out girl, focus on the positive always. What a great, life-affirming post. So pleased to call you my home girl too. Love you babes xoxo
    Babes about Town recently posted…London Kids Weekend Scoop (Sep 25-28, 2014)My Profile

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